Sunday, May 30, 2010

Floating on a cloud

As I just got off work a half hour ago and I have to be back at work in 5 and a half hours I will keep this brief.

Today was the perfect day.
Today I accepted the love that was offered. I accepted the greatest gift there is.
I was surrounded by people who love me and who I love dearly.
I am so happy and grateful.
I don't want to go to sleep because when I do this day will be over.
I want to cling to this feeling and remember it for the rest of my life.
I am blessed.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

By Rumi

Be Lost in the Call

Lord, said David, since you do not need us,
why did you create these two worlds?

Reality replied: O prisoner of time,
I was a secret treasure of kindness and generosity,
and I wished this treasure to be known,
so I created a mirror: its shining face, the heart;
its darkened back, the world;
The back would please you if you've never seen the face.

Has anyone ever produced a mirror out of mud and straw?
Yet clean away the mud and straw,
and a mirror might be revealed.

Until the juice ferments a while in the cask,
it isn't wine. If you wish your heart to be bright,
you must do a little work.

My King addressed the soul of my flesh:
You return just as you left.
Where are the traces of my gifts?

We know that alchemy transforms copper into gold.
This Sun doesn't want a crown or robe from God's grace.
He is a hat to a hundred bald men,
a covering for ten who were naked.

Jesus sat humbly on the back of an ass, my child!
How could a zephyr ride an ass?
Spirit, find your way, in seeking lowness like a stream.
Reason, tread the path of selflessness into eternity.

Remember God so much that you are forgotten.
Let the caller and the called disappear;
be lost in the Call.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Take it.
Take the love that is offered to you,
because being scared isn't a reason not to.

"Nobody ever laid on their deathbed wishing they had less love."

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

You know what would be awesome?

*If I could eat muffins, pastry, or cinnamon rolls for breakfast every morning and not gain weight.

*If cars never broke down.

*If I could snap my fingers and solve problems.

*If math was not a college requirement.

*If I wasn't so shy.

*If I won a free gym membership and the gym had a pool.

*If people would practice random acts of kindness every day. A smile can make someones day.

*If my phone hadn't just turned off.

*If I could put my feelings into words. I used to be good at this, I promise!

Monday, May 10, 2010

It's the small things

It's things I love Monday! I had such a great weekend. The happiness has carried over to make my Monday extra fantastic. I love that every Monday I want to include my friends on the list. Let's just assume my friends are the unsaid 6th thing :)

This Monday I love....

1. Vicodin. Oh how I love thee. I stretched/pinched a nerve in my back on Thursday. The lovely doctor at Urgent Care prescribed me an anti- inflammatory and this wonderful pill. Though it did give me a false sense of health and I'm pretty sure I overdid it this weekend.

2. How things are coming to me without being asked. I keep having questions and they keeping being answered in the most unexpected ways.

3. The first of the month because all the magazines come out! I love days when I get all my magazine subscriptions in the mail. It hasn't happened yet, hmpf. Hey magazine companies! I'm stuck lying in bed so send me my magazines!

4. Tori and Dean. While I was laying in bed today I discovered this show. It was a marathon today. I am so addicted to this show now. I refused to watch it for years. Lets blame it on the drugs.

5. Happy songs. Such as this one. Love.

Saturday, May 8, 2010


Lauren has a lovely blog over at
She has a fill in the blanks Friday and I am playing along this week. If you hop on over to her blog you can to. We both agree on #1

1. My favorite book growing up was : The Little House series and the Anne of Green Gables series. Actually any of Lucy Maude Montgomery's books. I loved Avonlea. In fact, I want to name my daughter that.

2. The funniest book I've ever read was: Anything by Laurie Notaro. She is hilarious.

3. The one book that has truly changed my life is: Dangerous Angels by Francesca Lia Block. This book spoke to me on so many levels. It is a book about love, life, the awkwardness of not fitting in but mostly it is about love.

4. If you're looking for a real "tear jerker" you should probably read: Dear John. I have never cried during a book but I sobbed during this one. Ohhhh Where the Red Fern Grows made me cry also.

5. If I could meet any author living or dead I would want to meet: Alice Hoffman. I love her books.

6. The next book on my "to read" list is: A problem from hell: America and the Age of Genocide by Samantha Powell. It's not a happy story but it is fascinating.

7. If I was snowed into remote cabin in the woods and could only choose three books to bring with me I'd bring : Love Walked In by Melissa De Los Santos, The Bible- my style, Dangerous Angels by Francesca Lia Block

Friday, May 7, 2010

I am stuck in bed trying to recover from whatever I did to my back yesterday. The hardest thing in the world for me to do is to lay around. I feel like such a lump. I have to take it easy today for as long as I can because I have to work 9 hours at work today. My back does feel a bit better so I am crossing my fingers it won't seize up again. I'm also carrying some extra strength pain killers. I am too young for this!

I have been stressing lately because of my to do list. It isn't a small one either. It is filled with some incredibly big things.

1. Find a new apartment in a different city before June 20th.
2. Find a new job in same city so I don't have to commute to my current job. Also, I am hating my current job and I need a change.
3. Tell my parents about some a fantastic decision I have made for myself that they will not like or approve of.
4. Find out how to best help my sister. She is so full of anger/rage and is not dealing with it in a good way. I don't think coming home for the summer will change anything. I don't think my mom is taking this as seriously as she should. My sister almost got evicted. My sister refuses to talk to my dad so I am trying to decide if I need to tell him what is going on. He used to be an anger management counselor so he would be the best person to deal with it. But how do I do that without my sister and mother feeling like I betrayed my sister's trust? Is it worth it? Would it only create more trouble?

Any suggestions would be awesome. I am feeling a little overwhelmed at everything I have to do but at the same time I have a sense of peace. I am working hard and I know that somehow it will all be taken care of. Well everything except #4. I am at a loss with that one.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Things that I love the list edition

So I didn't post a Things I love Monday list last week. Meh, it's my blog. So here is a list of things that I love.

1. Being busy. I like have structure to my day. There's nothing I dislike more than a day with nothing planned. This week I have really outdone myself. I'm pretty proud that I have managed to fit in time with awesome friends.

2. Learning. I love school though I may not always like homework. There is nothing more exciting to me than picking out classes arranging my schedule and buying new notebooks. Next term I'm taking Constitutional Law, Causes of War, Biology, and French, and I might take one more class. I'm not sure yet. That may be too much for me.

3. Road trips, but not just road trips. I love driving on a sunny day with the windows down and some good music on. I'm going to the beach with a friend on Saturday and I can't wait. I really hope it's sunny.

4. Sleep. I have been sorely lacking sleep this week. There is too much going on in my life that is keeping me up. I wish I had an off button for my brain.

5. Books. I am in the middle of The Poison Wood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. It is really fascinating. I really enjoy her writing style.

Well my dears, I hope your Monday was enjoyable and if not I hope your Tuesday is much better.